Halfway Down The Stairs – My New Home

FROM HIM: Halfway down the stairs is the stair where I sit, The other fucking stairs are just like it, I’m not at the bottom, I’m not at the top, But this is the stair where Edgar makes me stop.   Whatever happened to Robin the frog anyway? Just that one song and then he […]


What To Expect When You’ve Gone And Done A Baby

FROM HIM: Expect to be ill. Nowadays whenever someone tells me they’re pregnant, I substitute ‘Congratulations’ for ‘I hope you live near a Doctor’ or ‘Have you stockpiled antibiotics?’ Your child will never be well. You will never be well. Ever. Children when they’re well are excitable in a fun way, they laugh, smile, run, […]

Brown Fish

Shit In The Bath

FROM HIM: As Edgar has been nearing two and his communication skills are getting better it’s easy to mistake him for a small gentleman or scholar. This illusion is instantly dispelled though now he’s done a shit in the bath. We thought that our miracle creation was of the ilk that spurned shitting in the […]